Commuting to and fro on public transportation sucks. Let's face it, you are cramped into small spaces with less-than-pleasant smelling folks and you are forced to listen to their babble and their complaints while you pray that the next stop is yours so you can get off and be freed from your transport prison. And no matter what you do, the total suck-factor of commuting this way will not improve. While we cannot make your transit experience better, what if we suggested that you get to bone a busty, anal-loving whore the minute you got off the subway? What if you could get off, and then, get off in a tight asshole right after? Sounds plenty good, huh? Well, while we can't promise that this will become implemented in subways all over the USA, what we can say is that it happens, so have faith. You check out this hooker getting porked in an empty subway terminal and we will start working on recruiting more working girls to give up their ass tunnels in the subway tunnels. Enjoy!
Why do we like hookers? Because hookers are good for the world. That's right. We are here to tell you that by hiring a hooker you are actually doing your country and your cock a service. How? We will explain. Check out hooker Brandy Talore. She is so convenient that she comes right to your house to service you in the comfort of your own home. (She is like a small-business owner and you are supporting that.) The only thing you have to do is find your favorite spot and fuck her right then and there.(And you are technically taking her off the streets, decreasing homelessness.) And there is no awkward morning-after because once you have pumped and humped her, you can kick her right out, right then and there. And no worries, she will survive just fine without you. Because not only did you take her off the streets for some brief moments of comfort, but you also gave her money for her work, so you employed her. (A double bonus: you are contributing to the economy and decreasing unemployment.) She will clean herself up and go on to the next cock, just like that. Why? Because hookers are reusable, and somehow, some way that has got to be good for the environment, right? (It's like recycling.) So do something right for a change. Fuck a hooker. It's the humanitarian thing to do.
No matter how unfair it seems, sometimes hookers get busted and hauled off to jail. We know, it just doesn't make sense, considering the public service they provide. But it happens, regardless. But if a hooker is street smart and stacked, she can be in and out of jail in no time. Just check out Sarah Sunshine. She knows that the only ace in the hole that she has is her ability to drain a cock in no time flat, so she used that to her advantage, offering the officer on duty her hooker booty. And who could say no to a thorough cock-sucking and tight pussy? Some people have a get-out-of-jail-free card, and some people, like Sarah, have a get-out-of-jail-free cunt.
Trust us when we say that we know what it's like to be cranky, frustrated and in need of some stress-relief. Sometimes a guy's gotta go blow off some steam, you know, take it easy and just relax. And there are three or so ways of doing this. The first is a little miracle we like to call BEER. Except if you spend too much time with beer, you wind up with a headache and a gut. The second is a great invention called SPORTS. Except you can lose time, effort and even some cash on sports and it usually goes hand in hand with beer. The last is the best way of all; PUSSY. Pussy is a great way to blow off steam and even your wad. The thing is, pussy isn't always available, attainable or even around. Not to worry. That's why hookers were invented. Hookers are like the Chinese food of pussy; quick, reliable, always available via delivery, not so hard on the budget and after you have a lot of it, you can always have just a little more. Don't believe it? Check out Soleil Hughes' and her hookertastic performance in this video. She shows up, fucks, get paid and goes. It's perfect. So next time you are a little bit stressed and need some relief, just put your dick in a hooker, they always hit the spot!
In the year 2060, you will no longer have to go out on the hunt for tits and cunt. Why? Because in the year 2060, the hookers come and find you. Isn't that nice? So imagine you are minding your own business and you suddenly have the urge for a sloppy blowjob and some experienced poontang. All you have to do is put out the alert and the hooker closest to you will come and lay it down. It's kind of like when you need a plumber or a handyman and you call one in for a service call, except a hooker of the future will service your cock. Watch Carly, a pretty blonde hooker, fuck and suck this guy like it's no big deal. We can't wait until the day this fantasy becomes reality. It's a nice thing to imagine when thinking about the future. Puts a spin on the idea of cumming attractions.
A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. Even if that means she has to stand on the side of the road and offer up her goodies to the cars that zoom by. That's what Dylan Ryder does. She is strapped for cash and instead of pawning some jewelery or getting a part-time job, she is putting her pussy up for sale. Hey, wouldn't you do the same if you needed money to do something uber-important...like get your nails done? You can't blame Dylan for going out and fundraising via fucking. She is built for sin with big, juicy tits, a pouty mouth that practically belongs wrapped around your shaft and a pussy that will squeeze every last drop out of your nuts. But be careful...this gold-digging ho will squeeze every last dime out of you, too. But then again, it might be worth it.
We live in a world of convenience and we like what we want, when we want it. For example, when you want a nice, juicy burger, you can just pull in to your local drive-thru and order it. If you want to pick up some prescriptions, you can just mosey on over to your local pharmacy's drive-thru and get your meds. So why not incorporate that into how we get ass? How convenient would it be to just pull up to a corner nearby and order up some juicy cooze to go? That's exactly what this guy does. He pulls up to choco-licious Stacy Adams, working her wares on the ave, and he says, "I'd like some mocha poon to go, please. And a side of titties, too, super-sized. Thanks." And she jumps into his car and then on his cock in the motel a few minutes later. And when he is done with his quickie, he tells her to book and that's because just like fast-food containers, hookers like Stacy are disposable. Doesn't that sound quick and easy? You betcha. All hookers should be quick and easy.
Here is something almost unbelievable: Rich guys with millions of dollars need to hire hookers to get some action. (Yeah, cause the fact that they are rich just doesn't cut it with your average gold-digging slut. They have to pay for sex.) But, we are not going to argue with that since most chicks believe this to be true thanks to the magic of the movie "Pretty Woman". So in an effort to keep up that Cinderella-esque ideal that if a girl is pretty and charming enough, it overshadows the fact that she blows many, many cocks for money and a rich guy will save her from the streets. Let's pretend that Kianna Dior is a hooker with a heart of gold who merits some rescuing. Kianna comes across a rich guy who has a limo that he is willing to let her rest her tired tootsies in. (It's rough pounding the pavement and getting your pussy pounded, too.) So, being the overly grateful streetwalker that she is, Kianna decides to show him her gratitude with the only thing she has to offer a rich guy...her hooker pussy. Does he decide to whisk her away from all things hooker-like because of her prime, horny, pink clam and righteous cock-sucking skills? Hell, no! This isn't the movies. What he does do is promise her that he will be back next week for another romp in the limo with her. Hey, he didn't take her off the streets, but at least he is giving her a steady income, or rather cumming in her a lot.
If you are a dude who has a best buddy, you are responsible for a few things. The first is lying for your buddy whenever he needs you to. If his ball and chain comes snoopin' around, you deny and lie until you die or at least get your friend on the phone to warn him. The second thing you are responsible for is breakin' your friends' balls at every opportunity. This is important as it builds character and is just plain funny. The last thing you are responsible for, and probably the most important thing of all, is getting your buddy some strippers for his bachelor party. And not just any run-of-the-mill-dancing-for-dollars stripper, either. Nope. You are responsible for getting him a hot slut who is going to drain his nuts of every last drop of his single-man baby batter. A slut like Holly Halston. This stripper takes it up her slutty snatch, in the mouth and most-importantly, up her tight ass.
So remember, when the time comes to do right by your best bud, give him the gift that keeps on giving. Give him a big-tit hooker.
When you see Cassandra Calogera gyrating and grinding her hot body and mashing her big tits on the glass in the red light district of Pleasure Town, USA, you wonder why there aren't more of these districts around your neighborhood, right? Furthermore, you ask yourself, (or at least we did) why the fuck Sting & The Police sing and advise Roxanne to NOT "put on the red light"? We just don't get it. If she looked half as good as Cassandra does, we'd tell her to keep the red light on 24/7. This lucky dude actually gets past the glass and taps Cassandra's ass and ends up coating her chesticles in some man sauce. Obviously, he pays for her time, but who cares? It certainly seems like a wise purchase, and judging by the amount of nut cream this guy spills, he certainly seems to be a happy customer. We advise all busty bitches to put on the red light, take off their clothes and get on a cock, in that order.